Tuesday, September 30, 2008
love sucks man .
why must i get all these sia ? i wanna know answers and explainations ! but i cant get any . why why why ? i just wanna know everything . even if its good or bad , i still wanna know . at least i'll know what to do then . now , im just hanging onto nothing but memories with him . alot of ppl ask me to forget about him and he's not worth it . telling me i can find better guys . but its just not that easy to let go . even though its only a short relationship , but he's the first guy i ever felt like this before . maybe patching with him made me fall even deeper . hais . what should i do ? what can i do other than waiting and waiting and waiting . waiting for the day that i can talk to him and know every single fucking thing . i dont even know when the day will come .
i've been dreaming about him almost everyday ; good things and even bad things . thinking about him almost everyday everywhere . can somebody save me from all these ? this is a torture sia . ):
5:29 PM
Saturday, September 27, 2008
went his court ytd .
then quite alot of things happened also . dont know how to say luh . hais . very confusing . and i thoght i told myself i'll forget about him aft the court . but in the end ... ):
these few days keep on very tired sia . maybe im gonna sleep till i die 1 day eys ? LOL .
7:25 PM
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
fucked up blog . knn .
1:09 AM
this post will be dedicated to all my past memories with him .
those were pictures on 30th august , a day before my birthday . to think that he was so sweet to buy me a birthday cake and celebrating it for me and few days ltr he even bought 2 piglets for me even after we broke up . so sweet of him right ? but those were in the past yeah ? as much as i want the past to come back , it wont .
this was the day we patched back . it took me courage to trust that you would change for the better . i hoped that we would last long . but i was wrong ? everything was just a beautiful dream . all those promises you made were lies . all those beautiful lies of yours . your lies made me happy , but now , it made me disappointed . i dont understand . why did u do such hurtful things ? if you wanted to break with me to be back with your ex , i understand . but why ? why do you have to time us ? not only 2 of us . there are still others . what do you take us as ? your toys ? we have feelings too you know ? you know how heartbroken it is to know the truth ? its the same for her . we both cried like fuck for you . i dont know why am i crying for you . its only 2weeks . how deep can i fall in love with you ? i really dont get it . how can i cry for you so much ? i even got so stressed up i didnt know what i was doing . this is the 1st time i ever had this feeling . its so torturing . heart pain became physically pain . after thinking so much , i get headache . what for i think ? i dont wanna think about it too . but it just comes to my mind . i dont know the reason also . 26th will be your court . i know it will be the last time i'll be see-ing you if i go . i guess i'll say the last goodbye ?
on huifen's birthday bbq , at pasir ris , i did all these . for what ? cause i miss him . at that time , i didnt know he 4timed us . i only know he got caught by police . and i was worried like fuck . how stupid was i . there i was , worried for him and he 4timed me . hahs . im such a stupid brainless asshole . after this post , there wont be anymore pictures about him on my blog anymore . hais . its so fucking sad . how can a guy that treats me so good do such fucking things to me ? i dont get it . i seriously dont . <>
12:32 AM
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
so , i got back my hp ytd . yay ! =.= went out with homo ytd . thanks for being there yeah ? went to watch movie then aft that went back to tamp . was emo all the way . crying for no fucking reason . thanks to who ? him . i shall post all the pics with him ltr . memories bah . his court will be the last goodbye . last time i'll ever be seeing him . i dont care if im gonna cry or what . at least i wont regret . i know i wont . i should bury all my memories with him . its only 2wks . how much memories can there be . right ...? i can get over this . im a strong girl . i wont shed my tears cause of a bastard like him . okay , anw i shall post again ltr . going down to meet carol . (:
5:37 PM
Sunday, September 14, 2008
when was the last time i really laughed ? i forgot . seriously . i only remember me being happy ard you . i was so worried when u told me u went in . but to think that u have so many girls . what else can i do but to laugh at myself ? for being so stupid . all those tears i cried for u . all those times together . even though it wasnt longer than you and her . but still . i thought you were different . but . hais . i was wrong bah . i'll go your court hearing with yuxin . but , it'll be different eys ?
goodbye my love .
goodbye my laughter .
goodbye my laughter .
10:32 PM
so he 2-timed me . what should i do ? idk . i really didnt expect him to do this . nobody did . i trusted him . i trusted his words when he said he wont patch with his ex . he gae me his word . but i guess those were all lies . fucking lies that guys say . is there anything about guys that can be trusted ? i decided to go with him , but in the end ? was it worth it ? i could have went with ****** .
then i wonldnt be feeling like this now . hais . i wont regret . there's no use regretting . it cant make things any better . im just sad . why am i so stupid ? always making the wrong choices . hais . im a fucking stupid girl . D:
4:50 PM
Saturday, September 13, 2008
baby .
where are you ? pls pls pls be alright . T.T i dont want anything to happen to you . i havent seen you for such a long time alr . i dont wanna see u go in )): i miss you baby . i really do . i dont even know where are you , what are you doing . what a fucking girlfriend i am . im very stressed up . what if you really go in ? shd i wait for you ? what if its 3yrs 4yrs ? by then i'll be how old alr ? you'll be how old alr ? what's gonna happen ? hais .
******
im sorry .
i didnt mean to hurt you .
yes i do like you .
but i love my bf .
hais .
i cant believe i'll be in such a
situation .
i really do like u .
im sorry .
i didnt mean to hurt you .
yes i do like you .
but i love my bf .
hais .
i cant believe i'll be in such a
situation .
i really do like u .
12:42 PM
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
what the fuck is wrong with u man ?
just cause i said i was bored and i talked to u . tmd . like that also got wrong ? _l_ pcb . machiam i offend u or what shit like that . cb . dont talk then dont talk larh . i wont die without talking to u eys ? im happy not talking to u . curse u in all your relationships luh . omg i think im so mean . aww , but too bad . you were the one who's unreasonable first . im just doing what u did :D you cant blame me . HAHA . after knowing u since last time , to think that u'll become like that . lols ! i cant believe it . u're such a fucker . can i like slap the shit out of u ? LOL !
3:47 PM
